In a nutshell…
ISOLATED
*Life has drastically changed since I exchanged vows with law school. My life now circulates around it and everything related to it. I’m officially divorced from music and bumming around. I have no time for watching TV (except for the news) and for myself. I only eat once a day and I rarely get to eat decent meals. I now drink 5 big cups of coffee a day (and I think my eyes have developed resistance to it coz I unknowingly fall asleep when I’m midway through reading concurring/dissenting opinions of judges). I only get to sleep 3-4 hours a day and my whole body has been sore since school started…but I don’t mind all these…I’m not being cantankerous…in fact, I’m enjoying it…the pressure and stress…it actually makes me feel like I’m doing something important. 
(oh, by the way I’m not surfing the net right now for entartainment purposes…I’m searching for cases that I didn’t find in the lib…the website from which I’m getting them, lawphil.net, is loading too slow so I just thought of checking my mail and stuff…and I came across this news of Angelina giving birth to baby Shiloh Nouvel…and I almost had a heart attack when I learned about it…see? That’s how disconnected I am from the rest of the world…sigh). And all those hardship are exacerbated by the presence of "vile, despicable, contemptible" elements around me…well, I don’t want to elaborate. But the important thing is…I don’t allow them to affect or distract me from accomplishing my mission…and actually even if I would allow them to, they wouldn’t really affect me in the smallest way possible because I already have deeply instilled in my mind my purpose in UST law…and those unspeakable elements are mere incidental thereof. God, those cases now have undue influence on my writing.
ASPIRIN
**Our professor in Political Law is yet the most "terrorizing" prof I’ve met in school (and I’m sure I’ll meet more…IF I survive this year and the coming ones). He’s very sarcastic and he would actually make fun of the students. To some, it’s offensive, but I actually find it advantageous, if I may use that word to describe it. He’s "terror" image doesn’t really get to me coz he’s always shaking with laughter when he makes fun of the students and that somehow lessens the tension I feel toward his being "terror". You just have to know how to deal with it. And I’ve dealt with it every meeting coz it seems like he always sees me as the object of his sardonic remarks especially when he’s bored.
There was this one time that the class was defeaningly silent for what seemed like forever…we were having recitation at that time…and then he suddenly asked me, "In what Chinese movie did you appear in?" He was referring to me hair, which was tied high on my head, making me look like a typical, traditional Chinese girl. As if that wasn’t enough, he noticed my earrings and said, "When the wind blows, do they sound like chimes?" I just laughed with him. So every meeting, he would ask me "Where have the wind chimes gone?"
Oh yeah, he even changed my name. During our first meeting with him, he asked us to write our names on an index card. He called us one by one after we gave the cards to him and he’d ask us personal questions. When he read mine, he called out "Aspirin". Not knowing that he was referring to me, I didn’t respond. Then he called out "Nesrin". I stood up and asked, "Sir, me?" He said, "Your name sounds like Aspirin…from now on you’ll be known as Aspirin in this class."
And then my day came…I was asked to recite in his class…fortunately, I read the cases thoroughly and the texbook…he even said that he aptly called me "Aspirin" for I "cure his headache". After that class, he talked to me. He asked me if I’d be interested to join the UST Law Review (he’s the adviser)…I was surprised…delighted coz not everyone gets to be part of that org 
I’m happy and grateful at how things are turning for me in law school. I know I still have a long way to go…but hey, it’s a good start!
MA’ASALAMA
***My Mom and lil bro left yesterday for Saudi. It’s sad… just like when my father left last June 2, this time I felt like it’s the first time my Mom’s leaving. I don’t know…I miss her a lot. I mean, I’m used to seeing her in her room whenever I’d get home from school, tired and sometimes soaking wet. I’d tell her everything that transpired in school like a pre-school child, gushing about his accomplishments, like perfectly reciting the English alphabet in class. Then we’d have coffee and stuff…SIGH.
I felt even sadder when I got home yesterday…the room was devoid of everything attached to my mother…it was almost lifeless. I just dozed off…well not just to get away from that emptiness…but I actually really needed to. Something terrible happened to me yesterday.
KADR-DR!
****Yesterday, we had Persons and Family Relations for 2 hours, 5-7 PM…after an hour, my headache got worse. The pain descended down to the tip of my toes. I felt cold all over and was shaking. The AC aggravated it. Then our prof gave us a 5-minute break. I went out of the class, complained to my friend, Tere, that I wasn’t feeling well. I felt like puking. We even joked about me puking at our professor’s table, since I’m seated at the front row. I headed to the CR…tried to induce myself to vomit…I just wanted that "thing" stuck in my throat to go…but it wouldn’t come out. So I returned to the class and our prof was already back. I sat down, crossed my arms to shield myself from the piercing cold. I guess I looked so bad that our prof noticed that I wasn’t in a good state. He asked me if I was alright. I shook my head. "You may go if you’re not feeling well." And so I went ahead.
I was waiting for a cab at the Dapitan street when suddenly, I felt like I would puke any minute then. I ran to this fast food chain, thinking of doing the "kadr-dr" deed in the CR. But before I could step inside, I puked my guts out! Hahaha! I turned away from the said fast food chain and vomited on the street, where the canal was…all the diners therein could actually see me! But I’m sure I was still exuding finesse while I puked! Hahaha! Oh, those people must have cursed me a lot…
I thought my friend told our prof that I wasn’t feeling well…but she didn’t. I looked so, so bad that it wasn’t difficult for him to tell my state. This morning I learned from my friend that my face was so red yesterday. Hahaha!
I was just too stressed out. I only had 2 hours or so of sleep. I’ll try to take care of and have time for myself…but then…I don’t wanna get inside the class with an empty head. I don’t know…may God take care of me. Hehehe.
Oh, it’s time for me to go. I got the cases I need. Bye bye for now…til God grants me enough time to post something here…
Holistic Torture
This might be my last post in a long time so to all of you out there who waste their time reading my posts…well, I guess you won’t hear anything from me in the next 6 months. No, I’m not deleting my account…I’m not going anywhere. Just that…law school is eating all of my time these days.
My body is all sore now. It’s just been 5 days since school started but I feel like all my strength, energy have been sucked out of me. I thought I could still relax a little bit coz it’s just the first week of classes…but I was damn wrong.
It was just the 2nd day of school when our professors started giving us the list of cases…my friend and classmate, Tere, raced to the library right after it’s been given to us and looked for them…Philippine Reports and SCRA…it’s nice to meet you again. Hehehe. We went to the ground floor (the civil law lib is at the 3rd floor) to have the cases photocopied…and we were carrying like 7-8 SCRA books (they’re as thick as the Bible…even thicker!)…then we had to go up again, return them and get the other cases.
The story doesn’t end after getting all the assigned cases. We have to read, digest, analyze, understand and absorb them coz we’d be asked to recite them in class. And oh, this is even aggravated by sadistic, brutish professors who find almost orgasmic pleasure in humiliating, degrading students in the class!…Oh yeah…there are even cases that cannot be found in any of the SCRA volumes available in the lib so we have to search for them in the net. Hay…the same routine went on for four days…til now actually…know what? I think I’m not making sense right now, eh? I’m just so drained and stressed out…things were exacerbated by heavy downpour for the past 2 days…and floody streets with roaches happily swimming around. Gosh…I term it "holistic torture".
I have so much to say…they’re all in my cluttered head…a lot of things happened actually…but I’m just so tired to extract those thoughts in my head…and I’m too exhausted, famished to type right now…I’m actually searching for 2 cases this very moment…we weren’t able to find them in the lib…SIGH. And I haven’t eaten any decent meal for 5 days…my blood is now composed of 86% caffeine…OK, I’ll stop now. I’m not writing down any concrete thought…
You’ll hear from me after 5 years. Til then…
