RANDOM THOUGHTS
*Now I completely understand why adults/old people vehemently wish that they could be kids again. Some of them are so desperate that they resort to extreme measures–like acting like kids or trying hard (though in vain) to appear like kids. No, it’s not the anticipation of Death that makes them do so nor the fine lines that distort and crumple their once porcelain skin. It is the complexities of adult life that make them want to revert back to the period in their lives in which everything was simple…the carefree, almost problem-less life of kids. And yes, I’m one of those grown-ups who wish that they could be 5 again…oh yeah, I say this with conviction: I want to be back to the time when all I was problematic about was how to coerce my parents to get me the latest model of Barbie doll.
I don’t know what’s happening to me now but a few years ago, problems seem to have decided to reside permanently in my life–they have established it as their domicile of choice. And mind you, they are not small, everyday problems you encounter…they always come in the major form. When one problem gets resolved, another one comes knocking at my door, fresh from the oven. (I wonder who sends them to me!)
People think that I have the kind of life that every existing being would wish to have…because it’s almost perfect. YOU THINK YOU KNOW BUT YOU HAVE NO IDEA. It might appear as if I’m completely fortunate…that I’m happy and satisfied (well, I am in other aspects…like my academic life, for instance)…but behind the facade I’m putting on is a girl who’s at the verge of losing her sanity.
IF you think your life SUCKS and you just want to end it, try living my life. Maybe it’d make you wish to die a thousand deaths…or thank God that He didn’t give you the kind of life I have. I’m currently in law school and I don’t have to say anything about how hard it is. It’s not the thing that makes my life as hellish. I’m getting by pretty well. It’s some "other" things that exacerbate the hardship I’m going through in law school. OK, you don’t get what I’m saying. Let me paint the picture for you so you won’t have to disturb your sleeping brain cells to visualize things.
I live two hours away from school. I get dismissed at 9. A lot of times I have to get some reading materials for tomorrow’s class. I’d get home at 11 PM. I’d sleep and wake up at three to study…and get my ass at the library by 8 AM because if I don’t, I’d get my ass in trouble and be humiliated in class (that is if I get called to recite and I wouldn’t be able to even open my mouth to say something that makes sense). And oh, when it rains it’s so hard to get a ride…because the university I’m enrolled in practically becomes a black pool and drivers of public transpo refuse to pass by the streets that turn into river. So I’d have to wait till the water subsides…in those cases, I get home at around 12. No, no, no. We’re not at the climax yet. When I’d get home late (say, as late as 12) my parents would call me from abroad, shouting and screaming, accusing me of whatever immoral act they can think of…saying that I’m doing "something else" and that I’m not really attending my classes. Their fury is even worse when I’d be unable to inform them of my "late home coming" on account of my phone running out of battery. *SIGH* If only I could ascend to God’s Kingdom and speak to Him personally and ask Him to tell my parents what I’m doing everyday since He’s the only ONE who knows what I’m doing, He’s the only ONE watching over me every single second of the day.
Na-ah. We’ve not reached the zenith of my ala-telenovela life. Just like telenovelas, there are antagonists. Yeah, these bitchy antagonists make my life even more hellish. (It’s been said that "hell" is other people). They accuse me of doing this and that…that I’m not going to school…that in truth and in fact I’m "whoring" around…they scrutinize every little detail of my acts…and put meaning to them…for example, if I wear some jewelry to school, they’d conclude that I’ve become an adultress. They would find fault in everything I do…the hurtful part is…I’m trying to focus on what I have to do…I don’t even see them as I leave the house very early and I get home late at night…FOR GOD’S SAKE I even forget how they look like at times! I have no time to do whatever it is that they’re accusing me of doing…and yet they always have something cooking up for me!
Before, I used to get so affected by it…I’d pressure myself to constantly show them, prove to them that there’s not an iota of truth to their allegations…I’d worry about how to explain things to them…but I’m tired. Yeah, I’m fucking tired. I’m sick and tired because this has already become a sick cycle that goes on and on and on…endlessly. I won’t say I’m immune from these things coz I still get affected, though a little less. Actually, I’m supposed to be studying now but I couldn’t comprehend a thing I’m reading. I’m just so full of shit right now and I need to let it out. I think the best thing I can do about these people is…IGNORE THEM. It’s becoming so nauseating, cyclic, repetitive…I’m so fucking satiated with this kind of fucking life! They throw accusations; I rebutt them with the results of my actions…I guess I just have to do what I have to do…be mindless about them…I DON’T NEED TO PROVE ANYTHING TO THEM because ALLAH is my witness. I don’t even want to do things for them anymore…yes, I’ve become selfish…I’m doing things for myself.
Another painful part is…the people I tought I could rely on for strength during turbulent times actually form part of the source of my depression. They assure me that they’re gonna be there for me…that they support me…but in the end…I find myself totally ALONE. So I guess all I have is myself…and Allah. I can’t rely on anyone in this fucking world. They’re all alike. The person you least expect to cause you pain, to abandon you will be the first one to do so. It’s the truth and I’ve learned to accept it…that in this world, you got no one to rely on but yourself.
**I feel so underappreciated by the people who should show much appreciation to the things that I do. It’s so ironic coz strangers seem to see my achievements and appreciate them more than "these people". It’s weird how I get compliments from total strangers…and I never hear them from the lips of "these people". It’s weird how some people tell me they wish I were their daughter or granddaughter…it’s weird how strangers show me that they’re proud of me…and I’ve never felt "these people" actually being proud of me. It’s depressing…so depressing. If only taking my own life is not a sure way to hell (I’m in hell in this world…so why would I want to be in the real hell after this life?!) I would LOVE to resort to that…to end all this shit in this life.
I’m going through a lot…I can’t cry anymore…I’m tired…I’m sick and tired of everything…I don’t know where all these would lead to. I’m depressed, frustrated, upset, angry…I don’t know where to turn. I just gotta get myself out of here…on my own. Coz in this fucking world, there’s no one out there to come to your rescue. NO ONE. YOU’RE ALL ALONE. Better fucking believe me before you disappoint yourself with all your idealistic views on life…
A Sundry of Things
WHERE STREETS METAMORPHOSE INTO RIVERS
It won’t be long before España St. will be declared as the 9th World Wonder. Where else can you find a street which almost magically turns into a black river, with candy wrappers, cans, dead roaches and whatnot floating around, during rainy season? I’m sure this will add up to the "world/international" achievements that Filipinos have been garnering in different fields–from sports to mountain climbing to being the world’s biggest debtor.
I surely hate it when it rains heavily…because that would mean I would have to swim home from UST with the dead roaches. Gross.
I’M ONLY HUMAN…AFTER ALL
I finally succumbed to stress last week. I fell ill. Contracted bacterial flu, which seems to be rife. Even our professor who braggingly claimed that he wouldn’t be a victim of such disease because of his taking of VCO (virgin coconut oil) was not spared.
The lunatic person that I am, I attended classes last Friday…it was just a day after I contracted the disease…I thought I was quite OK…but as sunset set in, I started feeling dizzy…and I wanted to puke that orange-carrot juice I drank to make me feel better (which obviously did just the opposite). Lesson learned: I’ll have to give myself a break whenever I’m at the point of snapping into shards. I surely am not some supernatural being.
WAKE UP, SLEEPYHEAD
I was not late for my morning class in crim today! Yahoo! I slept late…but I managed to wake up early! Thanks to my new clock alarm tone. I recorded my voice in my phone, shouting "WAKE UP YOU SLEEPYHEAD!!! YOU DON’T WANT TO BE LATE FOR YOUR CRIM LAW CLASS!!! SHAME ON YOU, YOUR PROFESSOR IS AN RTC JUDGE HANDLING THE CASE OF THE OAKWOOD MUTINEERS!!! WAKE UP! WAKE UP!" Obviously, it worked wonders. And yeah, I recited too. 
THE GREAT VACILLATIONS OF THE GREAT MINDS OF THE BENCH
I finally found the case of Estrada vs. Escritor. I’ve been looking for it since I watched this documentary about it in a local channel. I wasn’t able to catch the first part of the program so I had no way of knowing the title of the case. But it really instigated this interest in me…I HAD TO FIND IT. For days, I’ve been asking everyone about it. It haunted me for some time, made me unsettled. It’s like that kind of yearning which you feel when you see a beautiful stranger in the fish market or something…hahaha. But thanks to my friend, she found it in the Supreme Court website. I immediately downloaded a copy of it, printed it and read it. A very interesting case indeed. What makes it a lot more interesting is that Justice Puno is the ponente of the decision…and I think, along with Justice Panganiban, he is one of the greatest writers in the SC. I LURVED the way he presented it…he discussed the historical basis of the case…very informative indeed. Good food for the mind.
OK, enough with my gushing about Justice Puno and Panganiban. The case is about this lady (Escritor) working at a trial court, who was having an "immoral" relationship with this man–immoral because she entered the relationship while her husband was still alive (and the latter was also living with another woman…maybe for the sake of parity, eh?). Some nosy guy (Estrada) filed an administrative complaint against Escritor…he’s not in any way related to her…he just had nothing interesting to do with his life so he thought of prying into the private life of Escritor. In the course of the trial, Escritor said that as a member of the Jehova’s Witnesses congregation and the Watch Tower Society, the relationship she was having was not "immoral" as this was condoned, even approved by the principles of her religion by virtue of a document called "Declaration of Pledging Faithfulness". The SC said that she could not be administratively charged because to do so would infringe her constitutional right to exercise freely her religious beliefs. It sounds like a benevolent and rightful exercise of judgment on the part of the SC…but will such decision engender a dangerous precedent such that transgressors of the law will offer as a defense their religious beliefs (and assuming arguendo that indeed the religion in which they belong uphold such act as not immoral or a violation of the law) ? What if some sinister people establish a religion that sanctions certain things prohibited by law and makes such as part of paracticing the faith?
THE SOLUTION ON HOW TO END THE LEGISLATURE-EXECUTIVE DEPARTMENT CATFIGHT
It’s such a pity that the big crocodiles sitting confortably at the Senate and the juvenile delinquents causing riot at the House of Representatives are not performing the tasks which their constituents elected them to do (or which they accepted payment for to vote for these crocs). In my 4 months study of the law, I’ve discovered that there are several provisions of the law which should have been amended eons ago to address the new changes that have taken place. An example of this is ART. 39 which provides for subsidiary penalty, to wit : "If the convict has no property with which to meet the fine mentioned in paragraph 3 of the next preceding article, he shall be subject to a subsidiary personal liability at the rate of one day FOR EACH EAIGH PESOS X X X"
For God’s sake, what can you buy with EIGHT PESOS these days? Candy? Mind you, the abovementioned provision was written in the 1930s.
We have so many good laws too, well-written…with hifaluting, complicated, superfluous even flowery words. But what good will these laws serve if they’re not executed and enforced effectively? What’s the use of writing and enacting various laws when those who are vested with the right and duty to execute them are the first ones to transgress them? (hello, dwellers of the Malacañang?!) These laws are reduced to nothing but words bereft of meaning printed on cheap paper.
Instead of doing what they are supposed to be doing, they engage themselves in endless fracas, propelled by envy on each other’s accumulation of stolen wealth. Hypocrites, that’s what they all are. And to Congressman Cayetano, that fat asshole, he should just zip his mouth and take care of Taguig, the city he’s supposed to be "representing"…as a resident there, I know that there are so many things to be improved in the place.
Since these officials are doing nothing but throw mud at each other, accuse one another of wrongful acts which they themselves indulge in, as a people the best thing we can do is to:
EXERT EFFORT AND TAKE MEASURES TO DIRECT THE DENGUE-CARRYING MOSQUITOES TO MALACAñANG, THE SENATE AND THE HOUSE OF REPRESENTATIVES AND TO ALL VICINITIES WHEREIN THESE CROCODILES ARE EXTANT.
That would not only eliminate these unwanted people who only exacerbate the depressing situation of the country…it might as well help in decreasing the ballooning rate of population increase in the country.
Til God gives me another opportunity to rave and rant.
A sleepless night, A Visit to Orion’s Belt, The Brilliant Minds of the Bench and Juvenile Delinquents for Legislators
*Damn it, I was late again for my crim law class this morning! Well, it’s not that I’m putting forward an alibi or something but I only slept for an hour last night. I arrived home at around 10PM, ate my dinner and went straight to the computer to type tons of cases I digested days before in my political law subject. I think I enjoyed it too much, I got too carried away…before I knew it, the room was already brightening up with golden sun rays! Hahaha! I tried to get some sleep before my 8AM class…and yeah, I woke up like 6:30, left home at around 7:15. And as I’ve said before I live worlds away from UST. So there. Next time, I’ll try to sleep a little earlier…coz what’s the use of reading stuffs all night if you won’t be able to attend your class the next day, right?
**This week was a bit less stressful coz our prof in political law went to visit his friends from Orion’s belt. Hahaha. Kidding. I don’t know where he went but he was gone for the whole week so it lessened the pressure and stuff. I was able to read more on my other subjects…coz it’s really poli that’s taking up most of my time…reading 50 cases to be discussed in one sitting is no human task! Hahaha! But I’m not complaining, really. Actually political law is one of my favorite subjects. I also like the teaching style of our professor coz he molds us to be independent-minded students…plus he’s really funny too. There was this one time, during my first Law Review meeting that I asked him a question pertinent to our lessons. "Sir, can I ask you a question?" "You already did," he replied, the ever sarcastic person that he is. "Sir, I just want to ask about legislative veto…is it constitutional or not in our jurisdiction?" "What did the Court say in that case of Macalintal?" <yes, he was answering a question with a question> "Sir, the Court did not explicitly declare it unconstitutional…in the opinion of Justice Puno, he only discussed the nature of legislative veto but did not outright say if it’s repugnant to the Constitution," I retorted, realizing that I was actually answering my own questions. "That’s just his opinion…what did the main opinion say?" he asked. Bad move, I thought. I was getting more questions than answers from him. I couldn’t remember the main case of Macalintal…what I remembered was it was about the law on absentee voting. "Sir, I read the case of Chadha…and it seems to be implied therein that it’s unconstitutional coz after the US Supreme Court rendered that decision, lower courts struck down several laws carrying legislative veto." He just smiled and said, "A woman doesn’t always have to say yes to a man. So he has to read between the lines…read what her smile or moves mean." OK, I sort of get it, I thought. "Sir, is it too hard for you to say if it’s unconstitutional or not?" I said in frustration. "Is it too hard for you to search for the answer yourself?" Well, he told me that it’s better if I’d search for the answer to my queries myself coz when I find the answer, it’d be instilled in my head for as long as I wouldn’t be deprived of my memory…and I find so much truth to such view. And so when I got home, I re-read the case of Macalintal. And yup, it was implied there that legislative veto is unconstitutional. The Court said: the Congress, by providing in the law on absentee voting that it could review, revise, amend or repeal the implementing rules and regulations of the COMELEC in executing the law, overstepped its authority. Such provision undermines the independence of the COMELEC, which the Constitution itself so protects. I’ll surely remember that.
***I really admire how the minds of Supreme Court justices work. No, I’m not talking about the brilliance of their minds…of course, they wouldn’t be occupying the bench of the SC if they’re bereft of such. What I’m referring to is how they can justify something that’s palpably wrong. They can make something that’s seemingly wrong appear right…and if you’re a passive reader, you’d be convinced. I like criticizing their decisions…it really streches my mind expansively…sometimes, they render judgments which seem to be not in consonance with the general principles of law, public policy and the like. Well, they’re only human and it goes without saying that they’re prone to commit mistakes. However, I think they should be more careful than ordinary individuals. They have to bear in their minds that they are the repository of ultimate justice, being the justices of the Court of last resort. Whatever decision they render is definitive and may only be reversed upon the institution of a case involving more or less the same issues. Well, to illustrate here are some examples.
1.) The case of Philippine Veterans Bank-NUBE vs. Vega seems to be in conflict with the ruling in Tañada vs. Tuvera (the second one), regarding the publication and effectivity of laws. The former case came later than the latter…so if you’re gonna adopt the view that later jurisprudence should prevail over earlier ones as the former is deemed to repeal the latter, then PVB vs. Vega seems to be controlling. However, the decision laid down there regarding the effectivity of laws is inconsistent with that of what has been well-settled in Philippine jurisprudence. In the Tañada case, it has been held that prior publication of laws in 2 newspapers of general circulation is a requirement as a condition for their effectivity. And so those laws which provide in their effectivity clause that they shall take effect UPON APPROVAL of the President cannot be followed. They have to be published before they bind the people notwithstanding the signature of the President. But in the case of PVB vs. Vega, the Court said that the subject law in that case took effect when President Aquino signed it into law as it was provided in its effectivity clause that "it shall take effect upon approval of the President." Obviously, it’s inconsistent with what has been laid down in Tañada. But the case of Tañada, though rendered earlier, should still be the controlling jurisprudence as it has been the one followed with regard to publication and effectivity of laws. Moreover, the decision in PVB, even if you don’t consider any legal basis, is apparently wrong. How can a law become effective and bind the people when they have not been apprised of its contents? The legal maxim that "ignorance of the law shall not excuse anyone from complaince therewith" shall have no basis if the ruling in PVB would be allowed to prevail.
2.) In Sanidad vs. COMELEC, the Court upheld the power of Marcos to propose amendments to the Constitution, when this power had been vested with the National Assembly (legislature). The Court said that since Marcos had already assumed legislative powers, there was no reason why he should be barred from proposing amendments to the Constitution, a power legislative in nature. From their decisions, one can actually see if they "fear" the President (or other executive officials for that matter) or not. They keep on saying that they are independent, non-partisan, non-political public officials whose task is nothing but to uphold the majesty of law…but it can be gleaned from some of their decisions that they are influenced by powerful, political outsiders of the judiciary. Maybe I’m just being too idealistic…and maybe justice is actually almost non-extant. It’s merely an idealism…and that no real, complete justice exists in this world…right?
3.) And yes, I really hate the issue on psychological incapacity as a ground for annuling a marriage. I just don’t get the reason why they don’t pass an absolute divorce law. They keep on saying that marriage has to be preserved and protected. But how can you preserve a marriage in which the parties involved are themselves the reasons why it cannot be preserved, they cannot healthily co-exist? What is there to preserve when the main elements consisting the marriage have fallen apart? Why force them to stay married to each other when they, by mere sight of the other’s face, puke their guts out? Why not let them give an easier remedy to get out from such hell? Is it not injustice? It’s not like upon enacting an absolute divorce law, every married couple in the country would line up to the Family Courts to obtain a decree of divorce…hello?
By forcible tying the parties together, it actually engenders more disadvantages and immorality. Well, even if the parties obtain a decree of legal separation, in the eyes of the law they’re still married to each other as the marriage bond continues to subsist. And so when the other has found a new prospect, he/she would be deemed to be commiting bigamy/adultery/concubinage. Does the strict preservation of marriage as provided in our civil laws serve the spirit of the law then?
The legislators as well as the judiciary should give much consideration to this matter. Unfortunately, our corcodile legislators are busy throwing mud at the President. Hay. This country needs so much change, holistic change…
Anyway, I’m getting too carried away. I think I should just write a book if one day I find myself doing nothing.
Til next time!
