This will be my last post in a long time…I’ll be having my finals two weeks from now.
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I want to be part of Philippine legal history so I have to work my ass off. CMMC–I’ll always keep that in mind to inspire me in my quest, in my mission.
Good luck to me! I’m going to miss everyone around here! *smooches*
September 23, 2007. Uncategorized. No Comments.
it’s true…. that people who take care of the person they love so much are the same person who need as much care from the person they love… but sometimes, the thoughts we offer are overlooked… when could that time be…? that we get to receive as much attention and care from the one we love without asking… di naman ksp tawag dun diba? sino bang hindi nangangailangan ng comfort? "
I got the abovequoted post from one of my high school friends’ blogs (Hello Chantel! I miss you a lot!). And yes, it is a thought to ponder on.
I thought about it after reading her post and tried to analyze why often times, what we give to a person we love is not reciprocated. And this is the answer I have come up with:
BECAUSE WE ARE GIVING IT TO THE WRONG PERSON!!!
It is not because that person is insensitive or indifferent that he/she does not give as much care and attention as we hope he/she would do. It is because we are channeling what we can give to the wrong people!
And what do I mean when I say "wrong" person?
The person is the wrong one if he/she doesn’t love us as much as we do love him/her; the person is the wrong one because he/she doesn’t care about us as much as we do about him/her; the person is the wrong one because he/she just can’t reciprocate what we give or how we feel about them…
What’s worse than giving what we can to the wrong person is this: WE WASTE WHAT WE CAN OFFER TO PEOPLE WHO DON’T DESERVE AN IOTA OF IT!
We waste our love, affection, care, time, attention, thoughts, brooding moments and what not to ASSHOLES, JERKS, BITCHES and HOs and we fail to see the people who truly deserve such from us.
And who are these people who stand aside and who are always ready to give us true, untainted love and attention even if we don’t ask them, even if we don’t give them as much as they deserve?
OUR FAMILIES AND FRIENDS.
Let me give an illustration.
Let’s say you are waiting and anticipating for someone to text you. That person is someone you consider "special" (special child; someone whose mental faculty is defective or even lacking…kidding). And then you see on your phone screen that you have one message. You excitedly open it and read the name of the sender. To your dismay, it reads "MOM". She’s asking you if you’re already safe home; if you’ve eaten; if you’re OK; if there’s anything bothering you…and you dismiss that as nagging. So you don’t finish reading the message and reply coldly "Yes, Mom" without even asking how she feels, if she’s fine and without telling her that you love her. But despite that shortcoming on your part, she still texts you a similar message everyday or calls you to ask you how things are going with you.
I myself am guilty of this. I guess I am one of those stupid people who waste her everything on the wrong people–jerks and bitches. I feel despondent every time I think of how I waste my life sharing it with other people who are unwilling to return the same to me and not giving to those who truly love me, those who’ll always be there for me no matter what happens (as trite as that may sound) what I can offer. I am trying to change this. I am trying to open my eyes and see who truly deserve to receive my love, my time, my attention, my care.
Yes, I do want to have that "special" somebody, maybe some years after I take my oath and sign the Roll of Attorneys. I mean, who doesn’t? Who doesn’t want to be loved and cared for by somebody other than those who can do so unqualifiedly? But I’m hoping and praying that somebody will be not be one of the "wrong" persons (as defined earlier) I’d waste my life on again. And as an addendum, I hope that person would be as hot and gorgeous as Atty. C******* (haha!), so intelligent that we can discuss anything under the sun, talented in the arts, great writer, honest and truthful, a true gentleman (definitely not a jerk!)…someone who would make me feel like a goddess, someone who’d worship me and make me feel like a princess…someone who’d love, care and give attention to me without being asked or without doing stupid things just to get those from him. OK, I’m getting too demanding (and corny) here. Haha!
Kidding aside, my point is that we do all want to have that "someone" with us and have him/her give us what we give them. But I hope that in our attempt to look for that someone, we don’t overlook those who rightfully deserve what we can offer while we live in this world and waste it on creatures who never deserve such from us from the very beginning…ah, in such case, that would be such a wasted life!
May we all find the right people to pour our love and time on and may we have the ability and wisdom to distinguish them from jerks, assholes, bitches and hos! Ameen! 
September 23, 2007. Uncategorized. No Comments.
I woke up early today (5 AM) because I had to go to the school library to read a case in my Negotiable Instruments Law subject which I couldn’t find in the internet. I was the perfect personification of the adjective "animated"; I was excited for the things I knew would and could happen for this day.
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After my class (and after having called to recite a case I did not digest! Haha!), I went straight to FEU, my dear alma mater, to attend this year’s Political Science Society General Assembly. I wasn’t only excited for that reason; I was exhilarated to see Angel (and Pretty)…especially Angel for we had a slight misunderstanding for the past few weeks.
I waited for Angel at one of the benches in front of the FEU-East AsiaCollege…minutes later, she arrived with her "little brother". We ran into each others arms and just hugged…and got teary-eyed. We just missed each other so much! (The last time I saw her was last June).
We proceeded to the Arts Bldg. Gym where the GA was to be held. And yeah, I was one of the judges of the singing contest portion! Haha! I was quite harsh with the contestants…well, I was just being objective, reasonable and prudent! (If Atty. Gorospe saw the scores I gave them, he would again call me "Carla Jr.", referring to Atty. Carla Seña, one of the strictest [and "terrorist"] professors at the UST Faculty of Civil Law.)
And then I did an intermission number–I did a monologue of one of Jose Rizal’s novels! Haha! Kidding. I sang "Umbrella", acoustic version and dedicated it to my Angel. (Well, the lyrics is actually the message I wanted to relay to her.)
At one point, when almost everybody went out of the gym to eat, I just hugged my Angel and cried…it felt so relieving and…peaceful. We didn’t really talk about the "source" of our misunderstanding…but it’s like we know in our hearts that we’re leaving it behind and we’re not allowing it to build a Berlin Wall between us. NEVER.
Pretty arrived later…she was one of the panel of judges for the dance contest portion of the program. I was just so happy to be with the two of them. I was happy to be visiting FEU after a long time. And I was happy to see familiar faces…and meet new ones. I was so overwhelmed with the warm reception I received from the students (especially Jei-jei and her friends!). Everything was so GREAT this day! Everything just fell into place. 
After the program, Angel, Pretty and I binged on some pizza. We just talked…and talked…like nothing’s happened at all. I miss them both so much.
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I know that no matter what comes between the three of us, our love for each other will always prevail. We can go through anything because of our sincere intentions of being friends (and sisters) to one another and of our pure, untainted love. I love you so much, Angel and Pretty. Always keep that in mind.
September 22, 2007. Uncategorized. No Comments.
I am torn. I am in pain. This is one of the times I’ve felt this kind of pain, pain that I cannot even articulate in the most poetic words. I am lost. I don’t know what to do with this. Perhaps, I should lift it all to the Almighty up there. 
September 12, 2007. Uncategorized. No Comments.
I miss my Angel and my Pretty. I love them both very much *sniff sniff*
September 10, 2007. Uncategorized. No Comments.
"The bar exam has been appropriately named "bar exam" because it is the last bar–the last HURDLE–to every barrister’s dream of becoming a lawyer." –Me
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I, along with the Law Review EIC and another member, visited the former Law Review members-barristers at the Manila Hotel a while ago. What I thought to be just a simple hi-hello-good-luck-for-the-bar-exams-tomorrow visit turned out be an eyeopener for me.
I saw how most of the barristers looked tensed (who wouldn’t be?) and I imagined myself being in their shoes. I think I’m gonna puke my intestines out when it’s my turn (Inshallah, if given the privilege to take the exam). But as we left the hotel, it came to my mind…why be afraid? I mean, alright, perhaps you wouldn’t or couldn’t think that way when you’re about to take the second installment of the bar exams (civil law and taxation!) but hey, just do your best and leave the rest that you cannot do to God and perhps some other factors which you have no control of (like for instance, the poor eyesight of the examiner when the latter finally checks the papers or his mood at the time he’s checking your paper!). I guess that’s the most important thing that every barrister has to remember. Just gve it your best and God will certainly see what hardwork, sweat and blood you put into it…I’m not speaking as God’s representative here (blasphemy!) but He’s merciful so perhaps He’ll give credit to you for the effort and let you pass. Ameen.
The othe realization that I had is that while you are still a law student, STUDY AS MUCH AS YOU CAN, LEARN AS MUCH AS YOU CAN, READ AS MUCH AS YOU CAN and DON’T WASTE your TIME indulging in some other useless things…because that’s actually your preparation for the bar exams and not the review course given when you’re already in your fourth year. It will be very difficult when you’ll be studying a certain topic for the first time weeks or even days before the bar exams. *SIGH*
Best of luck to all barristers this year!
September 8, 2007. Uncategorized. No Comments.
